Lately i've learned not to take my life all too seriously. I still hold on to my dreams. I still passionately work towards realizing them, I still give every job my best shot but i've realized that life will be the way God planned it to be - a series of problem solving situations and waiting tests. As to why we need to go through so much to find our peace is beyond me. I just revert to thinking they're meant to make me stronger and wiser.
Simple-minded thinking? I guess, but then the simple-minded ones are those that easily find their peace right? besides, I believe that simplicity is good, its igonrance that we should avoid.
But, being back in Manila for two weeks now, I'm starting to feel that "rat race mentality" again. I dont know why I only feel it here but when I talk to people, I really feel that everyone's out to outdo each other. Those on the top of the wheel gloat, others in the middle get fired up, some pretend to be strong, the ones in the bottom do nothing but compalin. One thing common to most - depression.
So, today, i had to remind myself of some things...
No matter How good you are at what you do, there will always be someone better, more brilliant, and "savvier" than you. Accept that! There will even be the crap of the crop who seem to be beating you in the race! It's sad, it's real. But to keep your eyes on them is to slow down your own progress! To even turn your head to see if they are shinning brighter or moving faster is a waste of time! Like life itself, Every creative person's journey is personal and unique. In the memorable words of my dear friend Migs, "Some are bright shooting stars who shine brilliantly and fast...then there are those constellations that take centuries to develop". keep your eyes on your own canvas, look around only to be inspired by the brilliance of others, without the stain of envy or jelousy. Then with great passion and unceasing enthusiasm, keep moving towards that dream that God himself has planted in your heart. Take it easy. Theres no need to hurry the process because haste makes waste. In good time, your passion will shine...and even if fame or fortune evades you, Don't fret, one day you will find you peace in being a shinning constellation forever, while the shooting stars have inevitably fizzled out.
I will finish this script. it will be done well.
I will make another movie. I will do better than my last one.
But I will live out my own journey as God wills it...in his own time...for his own purposes.
*Photo : I took this at the Fringe Arts festival in Edinburgh 2007. This boy was an important inspiration. His selfless passion for what he was doing was moving.
